Take the steering wheel and drive your own life, strengthen your emotional body, and live your life with more resilience, confidence, and freedom.
Hey, I’m Mike.
I’m a certified professional somatic coach, men’s work facilitator, and teacher.
I train men like you to strengthen their EQ, harness sensitivity as their super power, and become more attuned in their life.
We do this by working on 3 anchors of our lives. (More below)
This work isn’t about forcing or pushing through. It’s more about softening into our experience and letting our innate wisdom drive our experience.
You’ve done all the things you were told to do.
And you worked hard and sacrificed a ton to get here.
But something still doesn’t feel right.
When life gets stressful and overwhelming, you dissociate and turn to short-term pleasure. And you know this isn’t addressing the problem, but the quick fix soothes you just enough to not feel the stress. Then you might find yourself the following day or even the following hour craving that next moment of relief.
Idle time feels like wasted time. On weekends you can’t relax. Even on vacations you seem to ruminate on work, responsibilities, or even the next vacation. Every time you slow down an alarm in you goes off. And this feels like restlessness, incessant thoughts, and anxiety.
You wake up feeling flat, maybe like you don’t want to get out of bed. That feeling persists as you move through your day and you can’t shake it. You might say to yourself, “I shouldn’t feel this way” or “get over it”. And no matter how much you try to get over the feelings, you can’t. This then turns into a cycle of insecurity, hopelessness, and being stuck.
There was a time in your life when you felt confident — invincible. Maybe this was the time in your life when you felt unstoppable, accomplished, and motivated. Everything was clicking and falling into place. And you haven’t felt that way in a while. Leaving you to feel insecure, unworthy, and like a failure.
You have a belief that if you rest or slow down, you aren’t productive. And when you’re not productive you’re lazy, unmotivated, or worthless. So you pack your schedule — determined to keep pushing through til you reach that goal. Underneath it all, you’re stressed and overwhelmed.
You want to speak your truth without shutting down or blowing up. The moment you sense conflict, the tension in your body builds and the thoughts in your head become chaotic. You want to retreat and win the fight at the same time, but this leaves you frozen until that last button gets pushed and you come back with rage. This ultimately pushes people away. And it leaves you feeling shame, guilt, and confusion.
It’s common place for men to shutdown, numb-out, and cope when life get’s difficult.
This looks different for all men. And although many of you might have similar pains (seen above), your life experience is widely different.
It’s normal to feel lost and not know what to do. But when these patterns of dissociation persists, they wreck our inner world.
Then the vicious cycle of feeling insecure, unworthy, and not enough continues.
In my early 20s I started to feel pressured by society and my own inner world. These pressures were pushing me into an inauthentic life — perhaps a life that wasn’t mine. Burn out and panic attacks were normal. Depression and anxiety became my worst enemy. And my deepest desire was to know what my truest self needed.
I was dysregulated and that led me to cope in unhealthy ways — alcohol, drugs, porn, risky sexual encounters, and binge eating. Dissociation became normal. By 23, I felt like I had hit rock bottom. After several years of turmoil, something in me told me I needed to change.
It was in this state that I “woke up”.
📸: Azucena San Martin
I realized that I wasn’t living a life that was authentic to me. I was living a life that was expected of me.
I first had to get clear about what I wanted. The vision I had or perhaps the vision that was given to me was the picturesque all American family — wife, house, kids, white picket fence. I thought that was my dream.
Only problem, I’m gay.
Coming out was the first step I took to sharing my truth and living an authentic life. It was the riskiest decision I’ve ever made, but it taught me the value of trusting myself and trusting my innate ability to survive.
Then I started to heal my traumas and own my experience. I was tired of blaming everyone else for my life. I knew I needed to take responsibility. And this was tough because I didn’t want to look at all the ways I was responsible for my own turmoil.
Over the next few years I read personal and spiritual development books, hired a couple coaches, a hypnotherapist, and a men’s mental health therapist. And cognitively I could understand and analyze why I had these coping strategies and where they came from, but I still didn’t feel like “myself”.
In my late 20s I got certified as a professional coach and found somatic work. The somatic-body based approach to my healing was exactly what was missing in my healing. I finally started to own that I was sensitive and have always been sensitive. It’s been my sensitivity or my feeling sense that helped me survive.
📸: Tom Kubik
My sensitivity became my super power. And to further develop my craft, I enrolled in Peter Levine’s 3 year professional development program, Somatic Experiencing.
On my journey of healing, I’ve learned how to:
regulate my nervous system in times of anxiety, depression, stress, and overwhelm
own and accept past experiences and traumas so they don’t dictate my behaviors
create new behaviors that support my health
navigate conflicts with assertiveness, honesty, and vulnerability
develop my emotional and somatic intelligence
In my years of coaching, I’ve helped men:
save their marriage or partnership
feel like themselves again
develop trusting friendships
heal traumas
regain confidence
create meaning in their lives and live with vitality
If you’re interested to see if I can help you, schedule a free consultation call with me.
I won’t try to sell you anything and there’s no pressure to hire me on the spot. Give it a shot. It it feels right, hire me.
1. THE BODY
You know, feeling deeply is a core part of being human, but I get it, society has taught us to value our brains over our hearts, to solve problems and fix things.. It’s like we missed out on lessons in emotional intelligence because we were too busy being molded into thinkers and problem solvers. It's tough when you're taught to lead with your head, not your heart, right?
But here’s the thing: when you start leading with your body, listening to your intuition and heart, everything changes. You find yourself more connected, your relationships start to thrive, and your life purpose becomes clearer. This isn't just feel-good talk; there's a ton of research backing this up.
So, imagine balancing that sharp intellect of yours with a rich emotional life. That’s where real fulfillment lies. By focusing on your emotional and physical health, you're not just changing habits; you're changing your life. It’s about feeling better, having more energy, and really going for what you want. How does that sound to you?
2. RELATIONSHIPS
Life's not meant to be a solo journey. We thrive in communities where we feel safe, valued, and strong. You've seen the stats – men's mental health is taking a hit, and it's shaking the foundations of relationships. It's rare for guys to open up about anxiety, depression, or loneliness, even rarer to admit they need help. But the secret often lies in human connection. Getting in touch with ourselves and others is a powerful way to combat these struggles.
Relationships are our mirrors, reflecting our deepest needs to be loved and understood. So, just as we care for our bodies, we need to invest in our relationships. This means breaking old patterns, embracing honesty, voicing our needs, forgiving, and being open to change. It's not about fixing what's broken – it's about growing stronger together.
3. MEANING
When people are at the end of their lives, they don't reminisce about fancy cars or endless debates with friends. Instead, they wish for a life that was true to themselves, with less stress and more genuine connections and happiness. They long for a life that had real meaning. It's about the depth of your experiences, not the stuff you accumulate.
Finding meaning in life can be tough when you're swamped with stress, feeling overwhelmed, and just trying to make it through the day. In that survival mode, all we do is, well, survive. That's why it's crucial to prioritize our bodies and our relationships. Meaning isn't about racing through life; it's about slowing down, accepting what life throws at us, and taking responsibility rather than playing the victim. When you discover meaning, you find your purpose, and with purpose, your definition of success transforms. It shifts from chasing material things to seeking a deeper, more spiritual fulfillment. I can't promise you'll reach Buddha-like enlightenment after our sessions, but I can promise you'll feel a whole lot better about your life and where it's headed.
It’s all about the chemistry we will feel when we hop on a call. If you feel safe, seen, and heard by me, we’re a good fit. This doesn’t mean that you won’t feel scared, nervous, or anxious while we first interact. Those feelings are normal. But do you also feel excited, hopeful, and relieved.
You won’t know until we connect face-to-face.
And the worst thing that can happen is that we’re not a match. And that’s ok.
I work with my clients virtually 3 times a month. Each call is 60-minutes long.
2 of those calls are scheduled and recurring. 1 of those calls is floating and scheduled by the client using a link I provide. Unscheduled calls do not roll over into the next month. If you don’t use it, you lose it. All calls are paid in advance and are non-refundable.
We don’t often don’t work on content first. We’ll first work on developing your somatic intelligence and the language of your body. This means dropping out of your head and into your body. I’ll teach you tools, practices, and skills to help you regulate your nervous system during times of stress and overwhelm so that you feel better.
We’ll also work on areas, topics, and problems in your life to help you gain a different perspective, take conscious action, and go after what you desire.
This is a slow and intentional process. Results show up after dedicating time to the practice.
- Emotional Trauma
- Physical Trauma
- Sexual Trauma
- Acute and Complex Trauma
- PTSD and cPTSD
- Relationships/Marriage/Separation/Divorce
- Lack of Confidence and Motivation
- Behavior Modification and Habit Training
- Somatic Embodiment
- Emotional Awareness and Intelligence
- Healthy Conflict and Communication
I share my rate with prospective who book a consultation call with me and are serious about doing the work. This is a form of personal investment and it’s important to me that clients feel safe investing into their personal growth.
Most clients work with me for 1.5-2 years.
There’s a 6-month commitment to work with me.
I have a BA in Education. And in my former career I taught young people all over Northern California.
I’m a Certified Co-Active Coach, ICF Certified, and I’m currently on my 3rd and final year at Somatic Experiencing.
Like many coaches and therapists, I don’t use just one modality.
In a coaching session you’ll experience a mixture of different modalities of therapy I’ve studied. I use a lot of Somatic Experiencing techniques, IFS (Internal Family Systems), Inner Child Work, Movement therapy, breathwork, and mindfulness.
I grew up in the San Francisco Bay Area where I was privileged to be surrounded by different kinds of people, technology, nature, and culture. In 2019, my husband, pitbull rescue, and I packed our home and moved to San Miguel de Allende, Mexico. I’m passionate about movement, healing, plants, basketball, snowboarding, and travel. When I'm not coaching, teaching, or facilitating retreats, you would probably find me doing yoga, getting my hands dirty in my garden, or cooking up a meal in the kitchen with my husband. My husband and I have been happily together for 12 years -- and we aspire to live past 100 and celebrate our 50th wedding anniversary.